What you wish to be done: the golden rule, the narrow gate, and Mary

Spiritual Tradition Identifies the “Narrow Door” with Core Ignatian Discernment
The spiritual tradition has identified the “Narrow Door” as the essence of Ignatian discernment, centered in the “Election” presented within the Spiritual Exercises. This election—the life-shaping decision to which the Exercises aim—is precisely entering through the Narrow Door: choosing to place Christ at the center, aligning life priorities with the Gospel rather than societal expectations, and following the motion of the Spirit instead of the crowd’s flow (Mt 7:13). Mary serves as the model for this election proposed by the Ignatian tradition: she who was “elected” and responded with the fullness of her freedom.III. Mary and the Golden Rule: Service as a Way of Being
Mary’s life in the Gospel is structurally organized around service, embodied by the Golden Rule lived as a way of being, not merely an external obligation. The Visitation (Lk 1:39-56), Cana (Jn 2:1-11), and the Cenacle (Act 1:14) are the three significant Marian scenes in the New Testament, where Mary is always serving others: assisting Elizabeth during her advanced pregnancy, catering to the wedding guests at Cana who ran out of wine, and supporting the community of disciples in their prayer that led to Pentecost. None of these services were explicitly requested from Mary; they arose naturally from her attentiveness to another’s needs.Cana provides the most revealing example: “They have no wine” (Jn 2:3), Mary observes without judgment, and acts without being asked. The logic here is a reversed Golden Rule: she doesn’t wait to be requested, but acts because she has put herself in their place and knows what the situation demands. This loving initiative, acting before being solicited because she had previously positioned herself in the other’s perspective, represents the Golden Rule at its highest level: not reactive (responding when asked) but proactive (recognizing what another needs before they ask).Historical Interpretation of Mary
The patristic tradition viewed Mary as the “New Eve” in contrast to the Eve of Genesis. The Eve in Gn 3 took for herself (the forbidden fruit) without sharing with God. Mary gave (her body, her life) without retaining it for herself. The Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” is a reversal of the logic in Gn 3: instead of taking what is not mine, I give what is mine. Rather than appropriating that which does not belong to me, I offer what I have. Mary, who offered her womb to the Word of God, embodies this inversion of possessiveness into gift-giving.Mary’s Intercession as an Extension of the Golden Rule
Mary’s intercession, as a perpetual extension of the Golden Rule, possesses strong theological coherence: Mary intercedes for sinners because she knows what she would want done to her in their situation. “Treat others as you would like to be treated,” and Mary, who experienced God’s mercy uniquely, intercedes for the same mercy for those in need of it. Popular Marian devotion has always intuited this: turning to Mary because she “knows what is needed,” knows what it means to be vulnerable, and understands what it means to hope in God’s mercy.IV. “Do Not Give the Holy to Dogs”: Discerning the Sacred
The phrase “Do not give the Holy to dogs” (Mt 7:6) encapsulates the discernment of the sacred. It warns against mistaking worldly desires for spiritual needs, urging a careful distinction between what is holy and what is unworthy of divine attention. This discernment is crucial in following Christ’s teachings and living a life aligned with the Gospel.Matthew 7:6, “Do not give what is holy to dogs; do not cast your pearls before swine,” is disturbing for its apparent elitism. But the correct reading is not exclusive: the teaching distinguishes between indiscriminate sharing and discerning sharing of the sacred. The “holy” and the “pearls” are valuable realities that require a recipient capable of receiving them as such. Giving the “holy” to one who will despise it is not generosity, but imprudence that harms both the giver and the receiver.
The historical context illuminates: Jesus is teaching about discernment in ministry, what to share with whom, when, and in what language. The parable of the sower (Matthew 13) expands on this theme: the same seed encounters different grounds and produces varying results not due to defect in the seed but because of the ground’s disposition. The sower does not discriminate in sowing, but recognizes that outcomes vary. “Do not give what is holy to dogs” is not a refusal to evangelize all, but wisdom about the mode and time of sharing what is most precious.
Mariology contributes to this reflection with the image of Mary who “kept all these things in her heart” (Luke 2:19, 51). The phrase “kept in her heart” is the opposite of precipitate and indiscriminate sharing: Mary discerned what to share and what to keep silently in contemplative contemplation. She did not tell everyone what the angel had told her. She did not immediately explain to Joseph what had happened. She “meditated” (Luke 2:19) – “put together,” “interpreted” – before speaking. This silent contemplation that precedes sharing is the model of discernment suggested by Matthew 7:6.
The Golden Rule, the narrow gate, and discernment of the sacred converge in a single teaching about mature discipleship: act with others as you would like to be treated (reciprocity), enter the narrow path that faithful obedience to the Gospel demands even when it is difficult (decision), and discern what to share, with whom, and when (wisdom). Mary lived these three principles exemplarily, not as a calculated program but as an expression of a heart fully oriented towards God and others.
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